The Cry of a Father Who Lost His Son

The sermon begins by highlighting the importance of Scripture as a book that honestly records the flaws, mistakes, and sins of historical figures, including important persons like Abraham and David. King David is introduced as a real historical figure who lived more than 3,000 years ago, who killed the giant Goliath as a young man and became an extremely important historical figure. However, the sermon emphasizes that David was not a flawless, exemplary father, but rather a father with many mistakes and failures. The purpose of the sermon is not to condemn David but to help all believers learn from David's example as a father, since seeing others' faults is easy but recognizing one's own mistakes is difficult.

The second section develops the root cause of David's family tragedy. Around 990 BC, David committed adultery with Bathsheba, wife of General Uriah, and subsequently plotted to kill her husband. When Prophet Nathan confronted the king about his sin through a parable, David recognized his transgression, but he had to pay the price with the lives of four sons. God's judgment was clear: "The sword will never depart from your house" and "I will bring calamity upon you from within your own household." The direct consequence of David's sin appeared around 985 BC when Amnon, the firstborn, raped Tamar, the sister of Absalom. Although David was very angry when he heard the news, he neither punished Amnon's grave sin nor took any action. David's silence and inaction are especially striking when compared with his weeping and mourning when Bathsheba's firstborn son became seriously ill.

The third section explores the consequences of David's passivity as a father. When David failed to punish Amnon for raping Tamar, Absalom harbored resentment. Two years later, Absalom killed Amnon to avenge his sister. The sermon points out that David, although a capable military commander and excellent leader, was a passive father who did not discipline his children, only knew anger but not instruction. The king's indifference toward Tamar—a young woman who was violated, forced to live alone in the palace with no husband, no children, no future—reflects a society that valued men over women. The sermon emphasizes that at the cross, men and women are equal in God's sight, as Paul wrote in Galatians 3:26-28.

The fourth section focuses on the spreading consequences of David's passivity. After being permitted to return to Jerusalem, Absalom was not allowed to see the king for two years. Five years after Amnon's death, David finally sought reconciliation with his son. This prolonged delay in reconciliation and failure to establish justice for Tamar caused Absalom to hate and despise his father. As a result, Absalom conspired to seize his father's throne, leading to a terrible civil war with 20,000 casualties. The image of "a stone cast into calm waters" describes how the ripples of David's influence spread from the family to the army to the entire nation. When David heard that Absalom was killed, he wept bitterly: "Would that I had died instead of you!" Yet he did not weep for Tamar who was raped, reflecting the king's lack of justice toward his daughter.

The final section draws practical lessons for modern parents. The sermon emphasizes that teaching must begin when children are young and should not wait until something goes wrong before expressing anger and rebuke. Proverbs 22:6—"Train up a child in the way he should go"—stresses that a tree must be bent while young to grow straight. Parents must actively participate in their children's lives, teaching, encouraging, supporting, and disciplining them with the purpose of helping them follow the right path from childhood through maturity. Paul's instruction in Ephesians 6:4—"Fathers, do not exasperate your children; rather, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord"—provides clear guidance for parents. The sermon concludes with the story of General Douglas MacArthur, who received the award for "best father" and emphasized that he was prouder to be a father than a general, because "a father only builds, he never destroys."