Marriage as God Established It
Pastor Tan Thai · Oct 30, 2011
This sermon based on Matthew 5:31-32 and 19:3-9 presents God's original intention in establishing marriage between a man and a woman so that the two become one flesh for life. The pastor explains that divorce was not part of God's design but was permitted because of human hardness of heart, and calls the congregation to learn forgiveness and change in order to strengthen their marriages according to God's Word.
The sermon opens with a contrast between marriage and divorce: marriage unites two lives and brings joy and happiness, while divorce causes loss, brokenness, and wounds that are slow to heal. The pastor uses the story of Prince Charles and Princess Diana's marriage as an illustration showing that even a union admired by the whole world can end in tragedy. The purpose of the sermon is not to heap guilt on those who have experienced divorce, but to help the congregation understand God's original intention when He established marriage.
The pastor presents three primary purposes of marriage according to Genesis 1-2: to continue the human race (1:28), to provide a helper and companion in all circumstances of life (2:18), and to express the mutual self-giving of love through physical union becoming 'one flesh' (2:24). Marriage begins when a man leaves his father and mother, is joined to his wife, and the two become one flesh — this is God's eternal design, not a human invention. The sermon also addresses alarming trends in modern society, where marriage rates have dropped sharply, divorce rates have reached 1 in 2, and many people no longer consider marriage necessary.
In explaining Jesus' teaching in Matthew 19, the pastor highlights the contrast between the Pharisees' attitude and that of Jesus. The Pharisees focused on grounds for divorce, while Jesus focused on the permanence of marriage and recalled God's original design. Jesus explained that Moses permitted divorce not because it was God's will, but because of the hardness of human hearts. Only one legitimate reason for divorce is given — sexual immorality (porneia) — which encompasses serious sexual violations within marriage.
The pastor draws on the book of Hosea as an illustration of God's forgiving love toward a rebellious people, and calls the congregation to follow that example in their own marriages. He emphasizes that no marriage is perfect because no person is perfect — all are sinners who need to learn forgiveness and change. When one makes a mistake, courage is needed to admit fault and ask for forgiveness; equally important is extending forgiveness to one's spouse.
The sermon closes with a practical call to action: each person should ask whether their marriage is growing stronger or weaker, and what they are doing to build up their family. God's Word must be used as a daily mirror to examine one's attitudes, words, and actions toward one's spouse. The pastor quotes Matthew 7:24-27 about the wise man who built his house on the rock, reminding the congregation that a lasting marriage must be built on the foundation of God's Word and obedience to it.